May. 8th, 2011

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The whole family except poor poor pitiful  me was in Florida at my mom & dad's. Even though being with them all at once stresses me out and turns me into a 14 year-old brat, I felt a few pangs of being left out and forgotten. I'll always be a brat as far as the fam' goes but at least now as a 50 year-old brat I can laugh at myself at thesame time as feeling sorry for myself.

About 10 years ago my mom told me she often had a dream where we were on a rocky beach and she had lost me. It was just us and I was a little kid. She said she was agitated and scared in the dream because she couldn't find me. She was calling and looking for me. She hated the dream naturally, it was very upsetting.

We talked about it several times and I tried to help her analyze it by asking what was on her mind at that point in her life, what did I represent to her, what did the beach mean to her, etc., but we didn't really get anywhere with it. I think about it sometimes.  I wonder if when she started having it, I was at a point in my life where I was really drifting away, I never really followed a "normal" path. Or maybe she was the one drifting away. We were maybe lost to each other. Who knows?

A colleague I temped with told me when her daughter was very young, one year for her birthday, all she wanted was a flying magic carpet. My friend bought her a little kitchen rug and she said she'd walk by her daughter's room and the child would be sitting on the rug clutching the sides with her eyes closed. That is one special kid, I thought. As did my colleague!

So, I wrote this short story for my mom for Mother's Day. I enjoyed writing it for many reasons, the subject, practice and imagining.  I haven't heard from her yet. She was busy feeding and celebrating with her kids and grandkids as she should have been when I called today. I asked her to open her email today--I didn't finish it in time to mail it with her cards--she checks her email about twice a month if that. I wonder what she will think of it.
  story for mom )My fire escape garden is growing. Last Sunday, Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday mornings, I carried about 8 pots of fledgling plants from the table that gets west sun - formerly known as the dining room table- out to the fire escape to get used to being outside in the eastern sun and afternoon shade. Thursday night, they spent their first whole night outside. I didn't know how they would react to foggy, cool and damp nights, but they've become sturdier and now that's where they live. Today was windy and I checked them many times, I have to learn how to grow things in this climate.  When the seedlings are bigger, I'll transplant them and hang them from the railings, since it is a fire escape and technically the path should be clear.  I'm still coaxing ginger to sprout from roots, inside.

I've only had houseplants here, I feel successful with these tiny plants! I joined an LJ community called [ profile] apartmentgarden when they were spot lighted a couple weeks ago. The urban gardening movement is really growing, hehehehe!

Take a gander-

4 pots of Asian hot pepper plants from seed & in the red former kitty litter pan, forget-me-nots have peeked through.

  2 garlic plants, one avocado and another pot of hot pepper plants


Rearranged the pots for the photo, I bought the basil and divided it into 3 plants, 1 is inside


View from the fire escape, zoomed in just a little



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