May. 22nd, 2011

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I didn't know Harold Camping, Rapture Fail-guy, bilker, conman, (does 'grifter' fit?) was an Oak Lander until this past week.

I enjoyed the joking all week and everyone I know expressed similar sentiments that once the Rapture folks leave, we'll all have better times here. A Native American friend posted a very cool statement on FB about how it would have been nice to get Paradise back right here on 'mama earth.'

I was still in a little bit of the past yesterday, or fighting a cold or just the pictures in my head, nothing major, just what I've been writing about this past week.  This week, I could see myself  clearly in the car with the lunatic, felt the sadness and humiliation I felt then and in the now, I felt heaps of compassion for that woman, that me. I think it has to be honored somehow, you can't stuff it away 24/7, you can't go numb. Anyway, I've slept a lot, Friday night and yesterday, immediately after the usual errands.

At 6:05, my friend texted me, but by then I was kind of over the whole rapture disaster.  My body was so stiff from non-movement. I was 10 minutes into a yoga practice when there was a big thud or jolt, the cats scattered to the back of the apartment. Nothing swayed, there was no rumble, just a big jolt. I half thought someone dropped something heavy in the building, half wondered. I kept doing yoga. Two seconds later, same friend texted, did I feel that?

Holy shit! How funny was that?  It turned out to be a small 3.6 quake in the east bay. Here at least Mom Earth played a good joke.

I have to think about the Mississippi flooding, the round of murderous tornadoes, the wars known and unknown, people suffering daily from hunger, violence and poverty; this rapture fantasy and hell for the rest of us, couldn't have had much meaning for them.

In [ profile] fortysomething I found myself over-defending Arnoldo's housekeeper because there was a weird judgmental thread going on. I don't like situations like that. 99 percent of it, we'll never know. He was a known womanizer his whole life. Didn't we all wonder (well to the extent that it crossed our minds) why Maria ever married him? It all came up when he ran for governor here. I figured it was sexual chemistry. Their kids seem awesome. The housekeeper fucked up and now the hell storm is on her. Humans fuck up and mostly do the best they can.

This morning is cool and foggy. I opened my fire-escape door to check the plants, they're all holding their own and the weather has been cool and rainy, so it looks like they're tough enough. I found a clear marble in the forget-me-nots container. Of course I wanted it to be a piece of a meteorite, a particle of a star, something from the universe.  I'm  pretending it is; and its some type of message left to me. One day I found an acorn shell, but no digging. It's nice having life back there. I'd love to have a garden-cam to see what was happening. I can't see it from any window, the window in the door is beveled.

And here comes the sun.


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