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openscarf ([personal profile] openscarf) wrote2011-05-19 05:46 am
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I'm glad May 18 has passed. It was just a day after all. All day I felt like talking about it and at the same time not talking about it. I felt like calling my mom but I knew I would cry. I knew I would cry if I let myself drift off, instead I sort of floated between a sort of peace and tension. The rhythms of our lives are remembered in our bodies, muscle memory, moved by the moon. We are cyclical beings. I got home fully ready to stretch and dance and smudge and meditate. The reality was though I just wanted to be very quiet and curl up on the sofa with the cats so I did. Its done now. No dreams last night. I'm very glad those 24 hours have left for another year.

I watched this, this morning and I feel lively again. Good morning! Do not smile while watching!


[identity profile] yummydeb.livejournal.com 2011-05-19 01:56 pm (UTC)(link)
I'm so glad you got through the day in your own way and that it is over again.

The 'wherethehellismatt' clips are quite possibly my favorite videos in the world, for real. I cannot watch them without actually getting tears in my eyes. There is so much joy in the world, if a person is willing to put themselves out there and just be silly, invite people to join in, ask politely, and go for it. I love that he has managed to get sponsored to do this almomst everywhere on the planet. I love his goofball grin and unbelievably silly and catchy dance. I love how it's not only children who respond (though they do it with the most excitement and pure joy than anyone), but that adults do, too, and with such happiness and abandon.

Do not smile while watching? I failed, utterly :-)

May your day after That Day's anniversary be filled with lightness of spirit and joyful infusions of love.
Edited 2011-05-19 13:57 (UTC)

[identity profile] openscarf.livejournal.com 2011-05-20 03:06 am (UTC)(link)
It's getting lighter, thanks!!

I was a 'wherethehellismatt' virgin, I stumbled on this surfing around the net. Yes! What you said! And somehow try to bring that joy into everyday life. Meanwhile let's dance! :-)

[identity profile] mollys-home.livejournal.com 2011-05-19 08:00 pm (UTC)(link)
That clip is wonderful. I could watch it all day.

[identity profile] openscarf.livejournal.com 2011-05-20 03:07 am (UTC)(link)
I am so with you!

[identity profile] panicalert.livejournal.com 2011-05-21 11:34 am (UTC)(link)
Brought tears to my eyes

[identity profile] dadadadio.livejournal.com 2011-05-22 07:01 am (UTC)(link)
I suspect we all have a 5/18, a day something was lost long ago. I have mine, 10/6, a day I wish I could relive to change the outcome.

Each year less energy is required to get through that day and the memories. After 15 years I barely note the day except to acknowledge what day it is.

What we lost is replaced by something we find in ourselves, the ability to survive, understand, and move on. I think we move forward with a stronger soul.



[identity profile] openscarf.livejournal.com 2011-05-22 05:18 pm (UTC)(link)
I'm sure that is true. In a sense I don't want to lose the power of that day, but this week was trying for me. It just drained me, but not in a bad way. It's so personal.

Is that date the day James was attacked by the dog? So scary too.

And yes, we definitely gain strength from those unimaginable situations.

[identity profile] dadadadio.livejournal.com 2011-05-22 06:18 pm (UTC)(link)
Yes, 10/6/96 is the day of the pit bull attack, but it was Jeffrey. I relive that day in my mind from time to time, certainly on the anniversary, but as years pass I feel less angst. We never forget these events but can learn to make peace with them.

[identity profile] openscarf.livejournal.com 2011-05-22 07:27 pm (UTC)(link)
Yeah, when it's one of your children, I imagine it can be worse. Sorry for the mix-up of the boys. Life is definitely a mixed bag.

[identity profile] dadadadio.livejournal.com 2011-05-22 07:10 am (UTC)(link)
That video is like the movie Brian's Song. Each time I see it I try to convince myself I won't get choked up but I know I'm defenseless. Anyone not moved is lacking humanity.