3rd day of unemployment.
I feel completely different. My energy has been concentrated in my crown chakra, my head, my heart. Everything was pulled up tight-back, shoulders, chest agitated, head bursting.
I can now feel my denseness, my weight in the chair, my feet planted heavily on the floor, everything pulling down. Grounded. My energy feels slower and deeper; its’ concentrated in my belly and root chakra. I feel my shoulders pulling down and down my back. Bliss. I feel my facial muscles letting go, my forehead, and my jaw. At night when I begin falling asleep, I feel as if I am the bed, the quilt and myself; the bed is really warm earth, I’m on it and in it, being pulled down, one. Memories, images of people and that place fading. I picture a black grease like substance, running in rivulets down and through my body, out into loamy earth to be filtered and purified. As it leaves, there’s more and more room inside for light; room to expand, to breathe, and to relax.
I catch myself replaying some situations or imagining others, sometimes, but the images and energy are weak, diluted and really easy to stop.
My time is mine, no schedule. Like an island in paradise. Time can't be wasted.
I took care of my administrative stuff. My budget is clear. My house is in order. I have this gift of a tiny bit of freedom. I can read, write and think whenever I want.
I'm thinking. I'm hoping I come up with something good.